Mike Adams is a literary slop zombie; a mutt breed of surrealism and violence; a man who likes his metal heavy and his rock southern. In May of 2007, he boldly published a book of maniacal short stories entitled ‘Toilet Bowl Soup: Redneck Tales from the Armpit of America’ - selling more than 10,000 copies worldwide. However, in 2010, he released ‘Toilet Bowl Soup: The Holy Sh*t’, which sold about 100 copies - if you count close friends, relatives and other people who felt sorry for him. Mike Adams also co-stars in the films ‘Watch Out’, ‘Phone Sex’, ‘Wamego: Ultimatum’, and ‘Trust Me’. He has also contributed music to the movie “It Came from Trafalgar” starring Hank Williams III and Gunnar Hansen from the Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Mike Adams currently resides in Southern Indiana where he writes for a number of Townsquare Media websites, HIGH TIMES, Playboy's The Smoking Jacket, and Hustler magazine.
Mike Adams
Prehistoric Perversion — 4,000 Year Old Pornography Is Downright Kinky
Neck-biting boner lust, bisexuality and headless orgies are apparently pretty old news, judging from these ancient pornographic images that date back to nearly 4,000 years ago. We always knew Captain Caveman was secretly a freak.
New App Allows You to Tweet From Beyond the Grave
A controversial new app set to be released in March aims to keep the Twitter statuses of the dead and buried alive, by continuously updating them long after the worms eat into their brains.
Scientists Discover Green Jelly After Meteor Hits Russia
Just days after a fiery meteor came crashing down on central Russia, scientists say they have now discovered a mysterious green jelly that may be some sort of space residue or “astral jelly,” a substance commonly associated with meteor showers.
Maker’s Mark Stops Watering Down Their Bourbon, Vacation Day Requests Skyrocket
In an attempt to not be tortured and burned at the stake by their customer base, executives at Maker’s Mark have announced that the distillery no longer plans to cut their world famous bourbon with water.
Would You Dare Drink a Ten Year Old Beer?
While alcoholic folklore often paints a rotten picture of a man on a mission to drink himself blind with things like household chemicals, kerosene and anti-freeze, it is the consensus of “the committee” that not even the most desperate of the breed would dare knock back a bottle of decade-old beer.
Fierce Space Storms Predicted to Cause Worldwide Hysteria … and Disrupt Social Networks
The technological world could soon be brought to its knees by a series of pseudo-apocalyptic space storms that are predicted to sever the heads of the world’s communication centers, satellites, and public transportation systems.
Cutting Whiskey With Diet Soda Will Get You Hammered
To the wild-eyed booze enthusiast, it is a sometimes-necessary evil to cut 80 proof whiskey with diet soda, to keep that girlish figure without having to throw your balls up over your shoulders and just do shots. Good news, friends -- it's also an efficient way to get tanked.
Tough Day, Bro — Dude Gets Abducted By Aliens and Charged With DUI
While there is no scientific proof that the consumption of mass quantities of alcohol will render a person completely insane, there is certainly no shortage of case studies within this mad, mad world to build a strong argument against it. See above.
Man Gets Stinking Rich From Stinking, Awful Whale Poop
It is hard enough to fathom, much less accept as truth, that some of the most expensive and luxurious fragrances in the world are produced using giant wads of sea dung, but it's true.
Budweiser Black Crown — Not Your Trashy Uncle’s Beer
Since the Belgians took over Anheuser-Busch four years ago, the brewer has been searching for new ways to cut costs while their mad scientists relentlessly work to develop new product lines -- including Bud Light Platinum and Bud Light Lime -- in an attempt to attract the more discriminating beer connoisseur.
Science Could Be Close to Mapping Out Alien Worlds
Scientists are making revolutionary advancements in how they study alien planets. Recently, astronomers discovered that they could use the process of reflecting starlight in order to create composite maps of unknown worlds that would enable them to define pertinent aspects of planetary life, such as land, water and clouds.
Drunken Jerk Drops Pants, Spanks Off, Sings for Police
Across the bayou, it is not difficult to find a crossbreed of stark-raving mad drunkards and dive bar sideshows aggressively humping the legs off civil society. Unfortunately, when there is nothing civilized left for these gutter fiends to devour besides the skin in between their teeth, the only hope for the rest of us is that soon the flood waters will rise again and bury these beasts at sea.
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New Research Finds Bumping Uglies Only Burns 21 Calories — Dibs on Telling Richard Simmons
If you've always lived your life by the age-old myth that you can burn 300 calories every time you knock athletic shoes with your partner in carnal knowledge, a new study suggests that you might want to start bumping uglies on a stationary bike or elliptical machine – recent findings show the average person only burns roughly 21 calories while barely sweating it out in the sack.
Sorry Honey, Can’t Load the Dishwasher Because A New Study Says Men Who Help With Housework Get Less Sex
Married men who kiss up to their old ladies by helping out with the housework are less likely to be bumping uglies with that same misses at the end of the night, according to a new study.
Star 1000x Larger Than the Sun Set to Collide With Interstellar Wall and Oh God What is an Interstellar Wall?!
Not only is the famed Betelgeuse star set to burn out the remainder of its astronomical life, but it is also on an immediate crash course with a ginormous interstellar wall. Thanks science, we were just saying earlier how we never wanted to sleep ever again!
Security Guard Accidentally Shoots off His Own Wiener
There is nothing funny about an overzealous pistol-packer desperately trying to impress by waving a loaded gun around. That is, until the idiot forgets how to use the safety, and shoots his own pecker into one of his tube socks. At that point, we must admit: it is a bit hilarious.