Amazon Reviews For ‘Liquid Ass’ Are Delightfully Hysterical
Yup! I just bought a bottle. Why not? I have 4 stinky teenage boys. They deserve a little pay back. However, my gut tells me...this is going to blow up in my face! Liquid Ass is a gag...literally gag...gift that is available on Amazon. The reviews are priceless.
Sadly, you don't have time to get this before Christmas...even if you have Prime...unless you're willing to pay and astronomically high shipping on an $8 item. But, there's always April Fools Day! So...go ahead...get it.!
Kay gave it 5 Stars:
This stuff litterally smells like ass. Bad Ass. Horrible Ass. You need to go to the doctor Ass. Tried it out last night on my boyfriend. Here is a summary of my night:
5pm: Boyfriend on laptop in livingroom. He had been there for hours, so I decided it was time for him to get up.
5:05pm: Sprayed Liquid Ass three times on a sweater in the other room, then nonchalantly dropped it in the livingroom, about ten feet away from the boyfriend,
5:06pm: Boyfriend asks if I forgot to turn the bathroom fan on.
5:08pm: Boyfriend comments on how stinky the cats poop is.
5:15pm: Boyfriend, with his shirt covering his nose, scoops all three cat boxes in hopes of eliminating the wretched stench.
5:45pm: Boyfriend goes on a mad hunt, insisting that the cats must have crapped somewhere in the house. By this time, the smell has engulfed the appartment (a small two bedroom.) He picks up every piece of laundry on the floor, throws the bathroom mats in the washing machine and finds a face mask and gloves to put on. (I am a nurse and keep some supplies at home.)
6:25pm: Boyfriend becomes convinced the cats must have stepped in poo and tracked it all over the house. After smelling all four of the cats, he decides the cats must have cleaned themselves by now, At this point, after seeing all of the good this spray had done, I sprayed it thrice more; once in each bedroom and once in the livingroom.
6:30pm: Boyfriend sweeps and mops all of the tiled floors, sprinkles baking soda over the carpet and vacuums the entire place. Durring this time, I make sure my bottle is hidden really well. I can't afford to get caught on this one.
7:30pm: Boyfriend becomes convinced there must be spoiled food somewhere. He takes out the trash and loads the dishwasher.
11pm: While finishing up the laundry, Boyfriend discovered the sweater. He decides the cat must have wiped his paws on it and says we need to make an appointment with the vet because the smell is concerning.
I will be using this spray about once a month for the rest of my life. Thank you, Liquid Ass. Thank you.
Presley, F gave it 5 stars:
This stuff... was good enough to get me suspended from school.. that'll be enough to tell you how it smells.
Lawless gave it 5 stars:
For a little revenge while my husband was busy in the shower getting ready for work, I poured the whole bottle of Liquid Ass on the backseat carpet in his car. I thought maybe it wouldn't work as well because I didn't spray it. Oh.My.God. When he was pulling out of the garage I was up in our bedroom. All of a sudden, I heard retching. I peeked out the bedroom window to see him in the driveway with all the car doors open. He was looking in the back, then in the front, then the back again, under the car, pulling out the mats and smelling them. All the time with a seriously perplexed look on his face. After about 5 minutes of this he got in and drove to work. I have no idea how he managed to drive the 30 minutes to work in that car!! When he got to work I received a text from him. It speaks for itself.
Dylan...poor poor Dylan...gave it 1 star:
WARNING NOT LUBRICANT!!! I have recently bought some of this liquid ass. I bought it because I thought it was sexual lubricant. It says it smells just like ass so I thought it would give me a more "real" experience using it with my sex toy. I immediately found out otherwise. First off the smell was awful, then if that's not enough, my penis becomes very inflamed and starts to blister. I'm freaking out at this point! So I hurry and go to the hospital and they ended up having to do surgery on my penis. Now thanks to liquid ass, my penis is now a stub. Also I have to rub it with cream which burns like hell. Hopefully no one else has experienced this.
Thanks Dylan...I'll be sure to inform the ignorant.
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