Sarah Explains: You Can Get Along With Your EX

It deeply saddens me to read people's stories on Facebook regarding custody and getting along with the dreaded 'ex'.  Now, I understand that there are safety concerns for some families which make such battles necessary.  But a vast majority are fueled by pure hatred and jealousy.  But is it necessary?  Who is really suffering?

Getting along can be done.  It's time for me to share my story.  Here is a picture of me and my husband.  In the picture is also my ex-husband and his wife (who incidentally is my current husband's ex-wife...I know, confusing).  These are our kids.  His, mine and ours.  This is all of us...together...at Disney World.

I think our situation is so unique with more obstacles and hurdles in our way.  You see, my kids step-mom isn't just step-mom...she's,also, the mother to my step-children.  We all have an input and say on what goes on in these children's lives.  While at times, they disagree with us and vice versa, we have to find a common ground and a way to make it work.  It's not always easy...I'm...well...believe it or not, not the easiest person to get along with...there I said it.  We have times where we've been at each others throats.  It's not easy.  Who wants that?  Why do people continue to add fuel to a fire?  Why do parents use kids as a tool to weaken the other parent?

During our moments of aggravation, I see what it does first hand to my kids.  Frankly, I see what it does to my own well being.  It doesn't feel good.  The kids love their dad.  Their dad loves them.  Everything else in the middle is moot.  That's how everyone should move forward.

As a group, we all attend parent teacher conferences together, sporting events side by side cheering on the kids and anything else the involves the children.  I'm often asked 'How do you do it?'  Well, tell me this...what's my other option?

Here is a bonus video of us telling the kids they are going to Disney:

Look how happy the kids are!!  I would have hated missing this if I wasn't included...and so would have all the other parents involved.

Now, for those wondering how does our particular family work.  Because, it's not your normal, run of the mill, blended family.  NO...we don't all live together.  We have mom's week and dad's week.  So, during the week, the kids are separated.  On the weekend, we alternate having all the kids one weekend and none the next.  The lil one, Chloe, is ours...so she stays with us full-time.  She does go to their house at times though.  But that's it in a nutshell.  Easy peasy.

Moral of the story....Try harder.